2.5 months on HRT and sudden problems

TW: Swearing, anxiety

So, I’m down to the last of my patches as I near my 3 month mark. I had to throw a few patches away (they say if the adhesive sticks to the paper underneath without pulling away cleanly you’re supposed to toss it as a defective patch) so though I haven’t hit 3 months yet I’m actually behind by a few. I go to call in 2 weeks ago about a letter I got in the mail, this “Prior Authorization” notice, and tell my doctor that she needs to log into this website, enter in the reason I’m taking Androderm, and recieve a letter in the mail stating whether or not they’re going to continue to cover me (which they will, as Trans* hormones are covered under my medical plan and this patch raises my levels to just below the standard range).

Well, a week went by and I was nearly down to a week’s worth of patches — and I know how slow my Endocrinologist can be sometimes. I called in asking if they’d done the letter yet, to which they said no, and asked if they could put my prescription in before the 1st (when the Prior Authorization requirement goes into effect) to which they said they’d get it started.

A week has now gone by, and my pharmacy doesn’t even know a prescription for Androderm is on its’ way. They’ve been dragging their feet and doing nothing for so long that I’m now down to the wire and down to my last like 2 patches (one for tonight, one for tomorrow). Monday is the last day of this month, meaning as of midnight Monday night this letter goes into effect — and until we recieve that letter (which can take weeks sometimes) I’m not covered for my Androderm and I’m gonna have to pay 450$ for a month’s worth.

So now I’m panicking. I JUST started to see some changes, and there is no way in hell I’m gonna make my housemate fork over 450$ for a month’s worth of patches, and I just don’t know what to do. I’ve been in gender-related therapy for like 9 years, and have been eligible for hormones for nearly 5 years before FINALLY being allowed to start less than 3 months ago. Why is it that I have to work so much harder than anyone else? Why is the way that I do things always the right way, right before I get bitten in the ass for it?

Monday morning is when my doctor is willing to START this process, and I don’t even know if I’m gonna have a patch left for Monday night. If they don’t do this AS OF MONDAY I do not honestly know how long I’ll be without my patches, but any time at all is going to start to reverse all of the hard work I’ve been putting in, and might slow my progress down in the future when I finally start putting them on again.

I really wish SOMEONE in a position that can actually help me would move their asses and actually give a fuck for once and HELP me get this DONE. I do ALL the hard work, seeking out every possible professional I need, doing every ounce of research I can to make this process go as smoothly as possible for everyone involved, going through my Real Life Test for like 4 years out of the required 3-12 months, have been seeing my current therapist for over a year when they require 3 months, have been in gender therapy for almost 9 years when they require seeing this has been a problem for 2 years, and I just CANNOT figure out what it is I’m doing wrong. Now I get to spend the whole weekend in a state of nothing but stress and panic over something that I seem to have no control over. I don’t even want to post all the amazing results I’m starting to see, because in a week they may slow to a stop.

I thought nearing your 3 month mark was supposed to be your first major milestone and a huge joy in a transguy’s life. Mine seems to be nothing but misery so far.

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