Officially 3 months on T!

3 Months:

-Hair: General body hair (mainly legs, stomach, and arms) is starting to get darker (though at just the wrong angle, light still makes it look blonde), get a little longer, and become more dense. Leg hair now reaches from just below my ankles almost all the way up my thighs. Facial hair is still blonde but a little longer, denser and pricklier. Hair on top of my head has stopped shedding, is growing a little faster, is a little less soft and more coarse, and my hairline has filled in/come forward and is a little more rounded. Start of a happy trail. Eyebrows have gotten bushier and thicker.

-Skin: Still just as soft, a little oilier and sweatier. A little more acne on my face (mostly on my forehead), the start of some acne along my spine on my lower back. Get a little more smelly a tad sooner, and I smell a little different. Skin seems to be a tad thinner around my hands, veins have become a lot darker and more prominent.

-Shape: Adam’s Apple is a bit more obvious and a tad lower, larynx is a lot thicker. Chin is more starkly square, cheekbones are more obvious and my general face is a lot less round. Neck is a little wider. When I smile I have dimples now. Shoulders have become broader, chest has become less dense and is a little easier to bind, and my hands have become wider. Muscle is easier to gain, arms, thig and calves have become bulkier and less flabby. Waist has become a little wider, hips are a lot thinner. Gut is a little pudgier, but thighs and butt are a little smaller. Might be just a smidge taller (5’3″ last I checked, will measure soon). Shape changes are more noticeable to others, rather than just to me.

-Voice: Much deeper. Cracks on a daily basis, doesn’t seem to go up and down as much now (goes up a little every few days before dipping down even lower). Normal speaking voice is almost the same as the lowest I can speak, seems to resonate from my chest — but without being so low it would do damage to my vocal chords. That’s just where it sits. Head voice had dropped as my voice did, but has started to go back up as my voice continues to drop. Can hit very low notes when singing compares to before (roughly Tenor range, I think), can no longer hit high notes like I easily could before. People have a harder time recognizing me over the phone and notice the difference in my voice in person now.

-Other: Periods have slowed, longer gaps between them. Much lighter, much less painful, but last just as long or longer than before. Nails grow in faster, and slightly thicker — but still seem to be flimsy. Appetite fluctuates a lot. Weight has stayed the same, but I’ve lost fat — which means I’ve gained more muscle (167 pounds when I last checked). Easier to walk with a more masculine gait and sit in a more masculine way, legs a little wider apart/pelvis a tad more forward/slight sway to my shoulders. General self-confidence is up, but sadly I don’t seem to pass any more than I did before in person or over the phone.

Percentage of time I pass in person: 0%

Percentage of time I pass over the phone: 0%

Unfortunately even when double-binding in all male clothes, wearing my men’s glasses which square out my face, with my men’s haircut fully done up with products, wearing men’s deodorant and smelling of men’s soap and shampoo, and all of my ‘posture changes’ in effect — reaching down and pulling out the lowest and most masculine voice I can manage without using any feminine inflections — I only ever get called “ma’am” and “lady.” And man is that getting really old, really fast. I feel like so much has happened and my confidence has gone up so much in the last 3 months that SOMETHING should’ve changed. Not even over the phone do people act any different — I still get all “ma’am” and “lady.”

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